It's a big statement, right? It's something I have become accustomed to saying about access classes “the latest course on that subject of relationships, bodies, awareness, blah, blah, blah, changed my world". It’s something I embrace. And, yet, THIS one session was different.
I have always been someone that asks or searches for a different way to be me—seeking a softer, more easeful way in the world. Maybe because as a kid I always seemed to feel like a fish out of water. The searching has been a way to find out how I can be more me, in an "out of water world".
With every Access Consciousness class, there is a gift of information to be —a download of insights to help me pertain who I am, and how I am functioning in the world. What can crop up are the hidden facets of me; each aspect begins to shines differently, as I acknowledge it and allow myself to be that. I start to re-member me, and I begin to get a glimpse of the changes, their gift and contribution, as I unfold. Three days of unwinding, unfolding and recalling of a different way I can be.
And then, I had this session… wow, this session! What was it?
It was a group session with Dr. Dain Heer called the BIG ESB.
ESB stands for the Energetic Synthesis of Being - a journey with energy into the spaces and places that I have no words for.
Someone else would see the session from the outside like any other. It was a potent energetic dive from Dr Dain Heer into the stop points, the limitations and the closed doors, in which we all live. Dain has a magic way of being present with all of this and opening up this space, and doors to other possibilities. This journey can sound somewhat airy-fairy when it is truly a gift to experience.
So, this session began and evolved, and it was fun and magic, and I loved it. I was facing the limitations, laughing and being present with it all. It felt so good. I felt so good. Such spaciousness. And this continued long after the session.
That night was a weird one; I had very vivid dreams and awakened in the morning as a different me.
Ha, ha, it was, and is, what I am asking for. Such a change! I never believed it was possible after only one session.
I was inside out, upside down, back to front, me. While this seems crazy for some to embrace this, for me it is the gift of choosing more. Like a baby chick breaking out of a shell, it always opens up my world. It can just be a little unconformable for a short time. Fighting these changes limits me and my world, while embracing and being with it opens up more doors.
Day 1 after the session was full of this space and awareness of something different showing up. Sometimes it flowed and was easy to be with, other times it felt like I was juxtaposition with myself. I used the access tools and asked questions to be with all of this unravelling. The question of "what else can I be that I have never allowed myself to be?" I had no answers, and I certainly was not looking for any!
I went to bed early that night, tired and ready for sleep. As soon as my head hit the pillow, energy flowed through me even more. What began to surface was something else. I had no words for this. I again slept restlessly, awakening at 3.30am with a mind race that I hadn't had in years.
Let me explain more. Before Access Consciousness, I used to awaken at this time and have my mind run through everything that I did wrong that day, everything that I needed to change to fit in. I would scan through in my mind every scenario possible so I would know how to react to it. It was an EXHAUSTING way to live my life. In Access terms it’s what we call Computational reality—equating, computing; the mind like a machine trying to make everything into parts, smaller, to make me fit into the world.
My mind was rallying against the change! This is what I love about Access; the exploration and the facts that the mind is such a limitation on the way we BE! Being is not able to be defined. You cannot compute Being. The mind trying to put form and structure to this flags up its limitations.
As Gary Douglas, so aptly puts it, " the mind is a dangerous thing, waste it."
This "mind F£$k" continued for 2-3 hours or more; my mind was trying to get a handle on what was occurring. Well, I would love to say I changed it instantly ( chuckles). I did not! What did open up was the gift of using the Access tools. I asked questions, I acknowledged, and I continued to choose something different each time, even if it did mean I went on a mind ramble for a part of that! It's all ok!
One of the questions that continued to pop was from Gary Douglas, "Who can I become if I stop pretending that I am not?"
This question stopped the mind race and began to open up another door of possibilities. This ebbing and flowing of a question, fight, question, a choice, kept going until dawn broke and I fell into a deep sleep.
As day two after the session broke, and I awakened, I knew something had changed. The to-ing and fro-ing of allowing myself to be with the energies created a break in the MIND’s armour, opening up to someone new;
"Who am I today and what grand, glorious and mysterious adventures can I be today? "
This one session by no means is over; there is a thrum in my world like a gallop of horses, driving me towards something so beautiful.
My ask is, what contribution can I be for you?
Where is your life is stuck?
Where is it you are NOT you?
What would you like to add to your life to create more?
The gift of energetic sessions knows no bounds.
I have a telecall coming up that is a group exploration, called "Energetics of Awareness".
Now in its 6th series, it is a space to journey into these limiting points and embrace the change.
If this is something you would like to adventure into with me and others, then you can choose here:
YES, one session can change a LOT!